„FAIRYMOUNT (vb. n.) Polite word for buggery.“

— Douglas Adams
„Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„Politics, n. Strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„Quotation, n. The act of repeating erroneously the words of another. The words erroneously repeated.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the Government from running amok by hamstringing it.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„LAXOBIGGING (ptcpl. vb.) Struggling to extrude an extremely large turd.“
— Douglas Adams
„WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.“
— Douglas Adams
„Politics are almost as exciting as war, and – quite as dangerous … [I]n war, you can only be killed once. But in politics many times.“
— Winston S. Churchill
„Boundary, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of the other.“
— Ambrose Bierce
„ABOYNE (vb.) To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly bad that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him.“
— Douglas Adams
„Knowledge is a polite word for dead but not buried imagination.“
— E.E. Cummings